Tuesday, August 7, 2012

Rindu. Rindu. Rindu.

Habis appointment with Dr.Sofiah tengahari tadi, Uncle terus bawak Abang Rayyan Ariff balik kampung. Kali pertama call, dok kat Kuala Lipis. Dan-dan tu jugak rasa nak pecut kereta pergi ambik bawak balik. Lambatnya Rabu nak datang! Rindu. Rindu. Rindu. 

Rumah rasa sunyi je.. Yang tinggal sorang makcik kecik ni jer.. Tu pun tak bising mana sebab tengah demam.. Rindu sungguh tak dapat tatap wajah handsome suci murni anak syurga mama.. Nasib baik ada Adik untuk dipeluk cium..



Adik, every time kita tanya, "Mana Abang? Mana Abang Ian?" Dia akan dongak kepala tengok gambar Abang Rayyan Ariff yang tergantung kat dinding.. At first, nampak jugak la dia tercari-cari Abang.. For sure, Abang pun mesti tercari-cari Adik Rifa Aleesya.

"Rindu pulak bila Ian takde ni.. Tambah-tambah bila tengok remote astro." Kata Ayah.

Rindu. Rindu. Rindu.

@Sime Darby Med Centre.. Result jumpa Dr hari ni, Dr naikkan dosage ubat sawan. Bagi inhaler for his lungs..

Have I told you guys that he's such a darling lately? Belum lg kot. Since Dr prescribed some new ubat on our effort to reduce the seizures attack, we are slowly getting back our old Rayyan Ariff. No tantrum and more well behaved boy..

Kesian kan? Effect seizures tu kuat sampai it changed his behavior. Too bad that we took action pretty late. Too bad that he got all the scolding for something that he did not do on purpose. These whole episodes of sickness had actually taught me to be a better mother for this special child of mine. Lebih penyabar dan lebih penyayang.. InsyaAllah..

Honestly, I feel so bad about this. It took me 2 months to realize that something was wrong. Out of all people, macam tak caya plak I overlooked this important part. How can I, as a mother, mistaken a seizure with a tantrum? Padahal, I'm well known for being "mak yang over" in almost all kind of situation sampai Dr pun selalu cakap, "Here we go again.." Setiap kali I gave her nonsense remarks..

Takpe la. At least, we're on the right path to recovery although it is still under the trial and error phase. Lagi pun, learning to be a good mother is a life-long process kan?

3 comments:

Mama Kembar 3 said...

yes agreed, it is a life long process. and I think forever pun there'll be times that we will doubt ourselves. Simply because we always want to do the best for our kids that even the best sometimes feels like it's not enough :-)
btw tak tahan laa tengok pic Rayyan Ariff tu, encem betul. rasa nak peluk peluk cium pipi je hehe

TheLight Eyes said...

saya dah lame follow blog mama ian..cume silent follower..hehehe
ian npk mcm dah besar sgt erk dlm pic nie.. makin encem..

Kak Fara said...

geramnyer tengok rifa mengetap bibir... ian dah besar.. :))