Wednesday, December 8, 2010

Warning!! This post was written in anger and frustration!

Yes, the post title has nicely described it all!
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Still struggling with the same old rejection.. It's very easy for them to tell me not to stop trying, to keep on putting the hearing aids on Rayyan Ariff even for just 10-15mins at a time.. Do they know that it's very hard to put it on, even for just 1 minute?
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Come on la.. We're talking about one healthy and strong toddler here! It's hard OK!! You know what is the hardest part? To hear him crying and to scold him for something that he doesn't know that it is very important for him to wear..  
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Yes, we keep on trying and hoping that he'll finally give in, but the rejections are too much for us to take.. It's like I'm torturing my own little baby!!
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 Earlier, this morning.. It's very heartbreaking to face this every morning before leaving for work!
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And this morning, with so much anger and frustration in me, I slapped my two and a half years old son across  his face for crying and pulling his hearing aids out! It was not really a slap actually, just merely a touch.. And because the 'so-called-slap' did not effect him any way, let alone to hurt him, he continued with his cry and tantrum! To add some extra spices to the drama, after he has pulled the hearing aids out, he threw the RM4K hearing aid away! My oh my, luckily we just put on one hearing aid.. Because honestly, if both of the hearing aids are broken, we DONT have extra money for a new pair!
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How la not to feel any guilt with this innocent face??
I left for work feeling so miserable and ended up taking half day leave to compensate Rayyan Ariff with some Mama-son time.. My leave balance? Just another half a day after reserving two more days for Rayyan Ariff's doctor appoinments.
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I'm just feeling so damn tired with all of this adjustment that we have to make.. I would do everything to distract him but to no avail, and he's still rejecting it.. 
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I'm deeply tortured and so does him!
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I dont think that he's hurt by the devices.. He's just being difficult. If it's my sister who put the things on, he will just let it be and will wear it for hours.. I guess my sister just has a good control over Rayyan Ariff..

Luckily, she's on her study break and she'll be coming in a day or two to help us in this difficult situation.. =)

14 comments:

Jiji said...

aku rasa sakit laa pakai benda tu kat telinga dia.. mcm aku ..sakit tau pakai earphone.. maybe struktur telinga dia tak ngn dgn alat tu

m@y said...

Jiey,
bykkan sabar ye..anak..dgn org lain dia bley behave tp dgn kita kdg saje je dia nk uji kesabaran.

Lightnur said...

Assalamualaikum Jiey,

He is one amzing little boy who would just do anything to get her mum attentions. He knows exactly how to manipulate her mum. Smart little one. Jiey my dear, I hope you'll find a way to deal with the test he put on you. Maybe he just need more love, more mum and son time.

With love,
lightnur

littlehumblelynn said...

jiey

im felt the pain :(
dont know how to sort this out but im always pray the best for ian & u as well..be strong dear :)

Heartilyina said...

sabar jiey. apa2 pun i wish u semoga dipermudahkan semuanya usaha utk u n ian ye. hugs!

transformed housewife said...

always hope to ease away your burden but not sure how. We can only offer our pray to you, Jiey.

Min said...

tu tanda dia sihat... insya Allah jiey, keep trying dan berdoa moga Allah mudahkan segalanya buat Rayyan!

mrs. hisham said...

yelah jiey,maybe dia rimas kot benda tu dalam telinga dia or sakit ke.yelah nk bagitahu lom boleh lagik.takpe,adik u ada.biar dia jadi people in charge.hehehehe.

PuteriKureKure said...

alahai Ian. nape taknak dengar kata mama ni...cian mama tau.

Bicara hati ibu aisya said...

Alahai..ciannya anak ibu yang comei nih.Sabar ye jiey.Tu tandanya ian semakin bijak.
Ayu doakan yang terbaik untuk jiey dan ian.moga segalanya dipermudahkan.

A Journey of Hafiy Hasha said...

Salam,

Semoga Jiey tabah menghadapi situasi ni. Saya kagum dengan ketabahan Jiey.

Saya mungkin tak pernah melalui kepayahan seumpama yang Jiey tempuh. Tapi, kekadang pernah juga tersungkur menyembah bumi. Time tu sy kerapkan baca
ayat

La yukallifullah hu nafsan illa us aha.

Surah Al baqarah (286 kalau x silap)

membawa maksud, Sesungguhnya Allah tidak akan menguji hambaNya selain dari yang mampu diterima oleh hambaNya.

Bina kekuatan dari ayat suci Al-Quran.

Saya tujukan lagu Segenggam Tabah untuk Jiey dan Ian. (boleh plak tuju2 lagu ek). Semoga terus diberi kekuatan.

Ya Allah, aku redha dengan ketetapanMu. Kerana ku tahu setiap yang telah Engkau takdirkan padaku adalah yang terbaik untukku. Ya Allah, beri aku kekuatan untuk menerima setiap dugaan dan ujian yang telah Engkau tetapkan kepadaku.

Doa yang dibaca setiap kali menempuh sesuatu yang sukar.

Ma Ri Ni said...

btw, coba u, husband, ur maid pun pakai benda yang sama kat ur ears time kat rumah (beli yang cincai-cincai jer, jangan pulak beli yang harga 4000 hehehehe). Maybe, ur rayyan does not want to be different, die tengok, napa saya kena pakai, napa mama, ayah, makcik tak payah pakai??? ini maybe yer, sapa tau lah the reason is not that hard.

LayarLara said...

Dearest mama rayyan,

Saya ada anak macam tu, tapi kes lain. Kes anak saya ialah perlu menutup sebelah mata untuk membolehkan otak memberi arahan supaya melihat.

Sangat payah, tapi semenjak dia berumur 5 tahun dah boleh la dia buat latihan. Tapi sayang, masa untuk pulih kurang setahun. Saya berserah saja pada Allah, yang penting dia sihat.

ieda said...

jiey...take a break.tak payah letak dulu.lgpun rayyan still boleh dengar jg kan...sian plk tgk dia nangis2 mcm tu.wait till ur sister is here then look at how he'll react if ur sis put it on.